The Art of Sensible Living

Sensible people, I salute you (or something a little less...military. Rephrase: Sensible people, I raise a slice of cake to you) because it’s not always easy, being sensible. 

A lot of people would disagree, confusing the sensible with the safe, easy or boring option. But there is a big difference between safe, easy, boring and sensible:

Not jumping off a cliff if all your friends were doing the same, just like your mother questioned you about – safe.

Getting a takeaway instead of cooking actual food – easy/lazy.

Not skydiving from a plane into the ocean – boring to the max.

Choosing not to be one of those crazy people that runs 12 marathons in a day - sensible

You see, there's a difference. Make the wrong decision and you could end up being scraped off the side of a road three quarters of the way into your sixth marathon of the day (5 points for making it that far though).

I am sensible (most of the time - ignore anything my family might like to tell you)*. I can’t help it. It’s part of who I am. When it comes to those pivotal moments in life I seem to always take the sensible option, quite often without even realising it was one. 

But sometimes being sensible requires you to look at the choices at hand, weigh the possible consequences and then make a decision. 

Sometimes being sensible requires you to look temptation in the face and walk away. 

It's not always easy being sensible.  

And we are an unsatisfied people. Choosing to look at life through the rosy glasses of hindsight and sigh over 'If only I hadn't...' or 'What if I had...'

I think C.S.Lewis (what a ledge) got it spot on:

“No man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good. A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is. After all...you find out the strength of a wind by trying to walk against it, not by lying down. A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness — they have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. We never find out the strength of the evil impulse inside us until we try to fight it: and Christ, because He was the only man who never yielded to temptation, is also the only man who knows to the full what temptation means — the only complete realist.”

On the days in which sensible prevails, I thank the God who makes us stronger than we think we are. 

On the days in which temptation wins, I am thankful for a God who understands temptation and accepts pleas for forgiveness.

*Sensible is right up there next to 'nice' in my list of least favourite character descriptions. nice is so bland - its like frozen yoghurt without the fun toppings or flavours. 

So What's Next?

So you’re wondering what’s next, what do to with your life. Join the club. This has been my most FAQ for the past couple of years. When I was in New Zealand we had many many conversations about calling and identity. We had one speaker tell us that we should pray like crazy and not do anything unless God tells us to do it. Another said that we’re not idiots and God knows this so we should figure it out ourselves. I was totally (to use an old skool phrase) confused-dot-com.

And since then it hasn’t gotten that much better. Over the past couple of years I have received a lot of advice on future plans and what I should be focusing on. Some of it has been really helpful and some of it not so much – one friend told me that I should “do something irrational. Have a family.” Thanks. Good Plan. That would solve all my problems right now. And I've even had that awkward conversation of “God told me you should train to be a missionary and then come and join me on the mission field in Asia. Just kidding. But not really. Just kidding. Hahahaha.” Excellent. Ha. Ha. Ha. I just threw up from laughing so much at the hilariousness of that comment, you should really consider becoming a stand up comedian.

Talk about first world problem – too many options and don’t know what to do.

Here is a collection of advice and thoughts and bits of conversations I've has over the past couple of years on how to figure out what's next:

The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind...Love your neighbour as yourself. Matthew 22 v 37-39

0 to 25 - Try everything but sin (rock climb, play sport, study arts, study science, write a book).

25 to 30 - Focus on ten things.

30 to 40 - Do two things really well.

40 onwards - Mentor and invest.

So do not worry about having enough food or drink or clothing...Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and He will give you all you need from day to day if you live for Him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. Matthew 6 v 31-33

God’s will is all over scripture, we know what He wants so why do we keep asking what His will is? Why don’t we instead try and figure out how we, in the fullness of how we've been made, play a part in it? 

How do you want to be living? What are the values and rhythms you want to be living out?

I think we assume that everyone knows what they want to do. It’s much closer to the truth to say that most of us somehow fall into the jobs we have. And only half of those people end up doing something that they like, and only half of those people do something that they love.

We’re not really given space to wander. Some people try out a number of different career paths before they find one they’re comfortable with. But we frown on this and say that they’re flaky. When maybe they’re the ones brave enough to try new things in search of what they enjoy. 

We’ll probs be working till we drop dead on the job, so do something you enjoy. If it takes ten years of wandering to get there then don’t sweat it, you still have another million years until retirement/dropping dead. So don’t be afraid of wandering, but do be intentional. 

God-given gifts + acquired skills + developed passions = vocation because of and for the sake of community.

Who do you know? Who do you enjoy working with? Who inspires you? What work environment suits you best?

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?

Maybe there’s not one perfect career for you. There could be several different things that you could really enjoy doing and that you could thrive in. So there’s not necessarily one right option. So don’t worry about making the wrong wrong choice.

Go to New Zealand.

Maybe God cares about who we are becoming more than what we are specifically doing 

Don’t forget to b r e a t h e.

  

I have been all over the place with this. I’ve had days when I’ve been super excited about the future, days when I’ve been so stressed I couldn’t do anything but try to run from my own thoughts (well, more kind of like baking than actually running) and then there’s been the days when I’ve not thought about it so it’s been fine.

The most important thing I have learned about this is that God is there no matter what. Whether I come up with a five year plan in the next week, or whether it takes one/two/five/ten years, God will be there no matter what I end up doing. He does not change. I can count on His character and His promises no matter where I am or what I am doing. And at the end of the day, I’m only visiting this planet.

"And be sure of this: I am with you always, even until the end of the age" 

Matthew 28 v 20

Community is... a choice

I've been asked quite a lot lately about what living ‘as a community’ actually means. My father thinks I live in a commune – I’m not that much of a hippy just yet (but I have started wearing more tye-dye clothes whenever I go home, just to freak him out a bit you know).

Each week living as a community means something different.

Last week was definitely about choices & being intentional.

Sometimes it’s just carrying out decisions that you’ve already made as a group:

• Choosing to share incomes and contribute to living expenses on the basis of what you earn and can afford
• Choosing to buy food as a household and cook together (one simple rule avoids confusion and the crushing disappointment of opening the fridge to discover the food you were dreaming about all day has gone - if you wan’ it then you gotta put ya name on it)

Or decisions that you need to make together:

• Choosing to spend time together (you know your lives have gotten too busy when you have to schedule 8am breakfast meetings with your flatmates so that you can all get your diaries out and book in time to spend together over the next two months)
• Choosing to pray with each other
• Choosing to pray for each other
• Choosing whether or nor to invest in a tumble drier ( with four girls a tumble drier is definitely for the win!)

And then there are the daily decisions:

• Choosing to not throw a book/table/chair at you roommate when she sings that one line from that really annoying song for the millionth time that day
• Choosing not to throw your roommate out the window when she tries to have a conversation with you before you've had breakfast, even though she knows you can’t deal with it (for those of you wondering - I had breakfast half an hour before our breakfast meeting)
• Choosing to forgive your flatmates when they don’t even realise you feel wronged
• Choosing to say sorry when you don’t understand what you did wrong/knowingly did something wrong
• Choosing to invite people into your home when you really need a night off to watch Gypsy Weddings
• Choosing to clean more often than you think necessary because you know that in the same way you can't deal with mornings, your flatmate can't deal with mess
• Choosing to share your burdens with others and help others carry theirs'
• Choosing to sing along to Bryan Adams at the top of your voice while you cook dinner with your flatmate (Bryan Adams – For shame! Minus 5 points to Rachel)

But then there are the days when the sun is shining, life is perfect (enough) and the harder choices, that require more courage and greater love, are o so easy to make. 

And then community is less about making choices and more about just living your life, with maybe a bit more grace and depth and love then you might otherwise have done.